We’ve all been there. Someone cuts you off in a meeting, and from that moment on, you start noticing everything they do to ‘slight‘ you. The eye roll. The sigh. The way they dont choose your idea in the vote. Suddenly, every interaction feels like confirmation that this person doesn’t respect you.

But here’s the likely truth: most of the time, those little moments aren’t as loaded as we think they are. They’re just normal workplace quirks, only magnified by the narrative we’ve started telling ourselves.

The Narrative Trap

It’s human nature to let past interactions color the way we see future ones. Psychologists call it confirmation bias, we notice the things that prove our assumptions and overlook the rest.

The danger is that once we’ve labeled someone as dismissive, rude, or difficult, every sigh or interruption becomes further “evidence.” We stop seeing the person for who they are in the moment and instead see a collection of old frustrations.

But what if you swapped the names in your story?

• If your work bestie leaned back in their chair and sighed, would you really jump to “They hate me”?
• If a trusted colleague spoke over you, would you shrug it off as excitement to contribute?

Chances are, the same action would feel very different depending on who did it. That’s bias in action.

Never Attribute Malice Where Ignorance Will Suffice

There’s an old saying: “Never attribute to malice that which can be explained by ignorance.” I’d extend that to include habit, enthusiasm, distraction, or even just a bad day.

The reality is, most people aren’t thinking about you nearly as much as you think they are. They’re focused on their own deadlines, their own pressures, their own thoughts. And that little sigh? It might have nothing to do with you at all.

The Power of Assuming Good Intent

When you assume the best of intentions, your work life gets a lot lighter:

• You don’t carry grudges into every interaction.
• You stop replaying minor slights in your head.
• You free up energy to focus on the work that matters.

And when something really is unfair or repeated, you can still address it, but from a calmer, more balanced place rather than from a narrative of victimhood.

Sometimes, it’s even healthier to meet interruptions with humor. If someone speaks over you, maybe you ‘return the favor’ with a smile and “imma let you finish, but…” the next time. Not as revenge, but as a reminder that we’re all human and imperfect in meetings.

Work Is Too Long to Be Miserable

We spend a huge portion of our lives at work. Choosing to assume malice, to hold grudges, or to catalog every eye roll will only make those hours heavier.

But choosing to assume good intent? That makes the day, the week, and the career lighter. It opens the door to enjoying the people we work with, to building stronger relationships, and to being happier at work.

So the next time you feel frustration rising, try this quick check:

👉 If someone else had done the same thing, would I feel the same way?

If the answer is no, it might be your bias talking. And that’s something worth letting go.